Brought to you by a Masters in Marriage and Family Therapy – Doc Kelly Egan – who is a dear friend of mine and a brilliant and beautiful woman…
“Congratulations, you’re engaged!! Parties, celebrations, and toasts ensue, all for you and your one and only. Pure bliss fills you, as you begin to discuss ideas, dates, and plans. The excitement is intoxicating! However, as some of us know, or are very well acquainted with; high intoxication levels can be dangerous, causing blurred vision and forgetfulness. And with these intoxicating excitement levels at an all time high, the actual marriage, may become blurred as we begin to focus solely on the one special day. We have all dreamt of our wedding day at some point, envisioning sugarplums so to speak and rightfully so. Yet, as we become immersed in the details of our special day, have we lost focus on the significance of the bond we are about to commit to, for our everyday?
One of the best ceremonies I recently heard was the detail that “Love is work”. Well that’s no fun! However, this work is the work that will continue to build your relationship daily to the strong bond that will encase your partnership throughout the years. In our modern day, we work harder than we ever have in school and throughout our careers. Our lives surround work, and often with all the advances in technology, never does seem to ever stay in the office either. Our values, thus, tend to surround the ideas of immediate gratification, and impulsivity. And, as the statistics would assert, we rarely have time, or patience, to work on our relationships. Seems ironic, doesn’t it?
Communication and dedication are fundamental, as you would give to anything you care about, can help to keep love and passion throughout. And, while planning your big day is one of the most thrilling times during your engagement, it can also be one of the more stressful times. In trying to manifest what you have had in your head since circa early childhood, surrounded with stuffed animals, you recognize the many other factors that come into play. Accommodating families, budget, and your sanity can be more than a frustrating time. And who do we usually take it out on? That’s right, your one and only. Whether your experience transpires as a smooth successful joy ride set on cruise control to the altar, or conversely, emulates more of grinding gears, in a new car…with no gas, the fact remains the same, that maintaining focus on your partner and the commitment you both are about to embrace is essential. So how can we do that, you ask? As impossible as it may seem, taking time to spend together without discussing wedding day details is instrumental in keeping focus on your bond and your upcoming commitment. Take time to discuss dreams and aspirations. Even setting some ground rules, so that whoever brings up wedding day details has to do something silly, can keep a fun loving atmosphere between you and your Mr., to alleviate any tension that may arise during the planning process.
According to Wikipedia, the word Classic is defined as “something that is a perfect example of a particular style, something of lasting worth or with a timeless quality.” Making sure to attend to the love that bonds you and your partner, in addition to the meaning of the commitment you are about to make, is essential in the part of ensuring the lasting worth and timeless quality of not only the wedding of your dreams, but the marriage of your dreams as well!
For more advice from Kelly, marital or planning advice please contact us at Some Like It Classic – Wedding and Event Design